OMG
U GOTTA BE FREAKING RICH AND KNOW HOW TO DRIVE IN ORDER TO TOUR THE STATES. OTHERWISE MUZ GO WITH TOUR GROUP MAN. BORING
DEFINITELY NOT THE BEST DESTINATION TO TRAVEL ALONE...

travelling alone.. the idea seems a little daunting.. i can eat my meals and watch movies alone.. i muz say i'm quite the independent girl.. but travelling is another whole new different story.. so more, i'm not tt rich. and i dun have a license. haha

bought a pair of asics! WOOHOO!!!
gotta start running faithfully again!
bought way too much stuff over this weekend.. 2 tops at f21 & pull&bear, 2 online checkered purchases, and the shoes.
and i actually wana buy more stuff... but guess i better curb my buying(s) NOW!

had a great dining experience with the pt2 ppls at chomp chomp!!!
oh man the hokkien mee is sooo nice i cld totally finish up the 5$ plate on my own! and so is the sambal stingray!!! WOOHOO! and i love the huge mug of sugarcane juice! it's been so long since i last had sucha delicious tasty yumyum singapore food!
next up, adam road with s55 ppls!

i wonder how our thai trip will work out... and the batam trip too.. so annoying tt nobody is replying my fb msg! :S

OH! and btw... i've decided that my next dream (hopefully not juz a dream) destination is UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT TO GO THERE! SO MUCH TO DO, SEE, SHOP!!!!
USA ANYONE???

When I see their happy faces smilin' back at me.
7th Heaven, I know there's no greater feelin' than the love of family.
Where can you go when the world don't treat you right?
The answer is home; that's the one place that you'll find...
7th Heaven, mmmmm 7th Heaven
7th Heaven

one of of my all time favourite shows, and one of my fave songs.. esp the the 3rd & 4th line :)

finally, the very last clinical placement has come to an end.
i still remembered the first time i had a look at the clinical placement schedules when i was in yr1.looking back, i thought 'damn. 3 freaking placements in yr3? how the hell am i ever gonna get by that?!' and here i am. been there, done that.
by far, this is my best placement. i've learnt a lot, i feel inspired to do well, and i think this is where i can perform the best for my patients...
of course i wish i was a more well rounded physio, and i might need some help in ms cos tt's my least confident area.

anyways, i'm really glad tt clinicals are over - so i dun have to face somebody every single freaking hour. things got juz teeny weeny better at the last few days, only cos she sorta screwd up and i decided to be sympathetic towards her. i'm really looking forward to sch.. to seeing my good o' pals and being ard ppls whom i dun get angry, annoyed or pissed at. haha. unfortunately, fyp status is not tt good. gotta start working on my statistics! ARGH. on a side note.. haha. 3quarter of my fyp are gonna be colleagues in future! WOOHOO!

bought 110$ worth of cosmetics.. kinda regretted one of the foundations.. doesn't seem to suit me:( sadness. guess when it comes to cosmetics, got to spend and splurge quite abit b4 finding the right one..

on another note,
and i need a pair of running shoes!
hope the thai trip works out in the end!

U! pissed me off and i dun like u!
i try and stay invisible when u treat ur pt and help u if needed/necessary.
but u! talk talk talk talk talk! i dun give a damn how friendly u are, but i juz want u TO SHUT THE FUCK UP and LEAVE ME AND MY PATIENT ALONE! u're seriously cramping my style u noe that!
the stupid questions u ask are as though u're my CE and u wld noe better! but u fucking don't! what 'quiet people score better than the vocal ones"? WHAT THE FUCK WAS ALL THAT ABOUT!? DID U SERIOUSLY HAVE TO ASK THE CE ABT THAT IN FRONT OF ME??!?!?!? ARE U TRYING TO GET HER TO TELL U THAT NO, ACTUALLY VOCAL ONES WILL SCORE BETTER AND PPLS LIKE ME WHO ARE SO QUIET WILL DO WORSE. FUCK OFF MAN!
I WAS SO TIRED AT THE END OF THE DAY AND INSTEAD OF JUZ TELLING ME STRAIGHT TT I DIDN'T CLEAN IT PROPERLY, U HAD TO ASK AND PROBE IN FRONT OF ME CE SO THAT I MADE A DAMN MISTAKE IN FRONT OF HER AND SNAPPED AT U FOR THE WRONG REASON

I WISHED U HAD STAY AT HOME FOR THE REST OF THE 2 WKS
I WAS PERFECTLY HAPPY THE LAST 2 DAYS!!!! I DUN LIKE HAVING U AROUND AT ALL! U SHLD JUZ MIND YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS AND STOP ACTING SO FUCKING HELPFUL, COS I FUCKING DUN CARE AND DUN APPRECIATE AT ALL. GO SUCK UP TO HER WHEN I'M NOT AROUND. DON'T FUCKING DO IT IN FRONT OF ME AND MAKE MY BLOOD BOIL!!!!!!!!!!!!

ARGH!!!!!!!! I HAVE NEVER USED SO MANY OF THIS FUCKING VULGAR WORD IN MY ENTIRE BLOG. I'VE TOLERATED ENOUGH OF U! I JUZ WANT U TO GO AWAY! FAR FAR FAR FAR AWAY!



ok.. after so much vulgarities. i apologise to any readers who are offended. joyce hasn't changed. she juz got angry and needed to vent it out. and yes, she was so angry she had an overdose of vulgarities in her blog. hopefully none in the future.
with regards to the above rantings, i juz wana say, maybe i'm over-reacting. perhaps i'm over sensitive. (OR PERHAPS IT REALLY IS HER FUCKING FAULT). sometimes ppls get on to my nerves, and if i keep quiet abt it, i'll burst out later on. The above wasn't a first. in fact, i ald told her off the other time rd. this time, actually she was juz annoying me cos i really didn't need her fucking dumb qns to try and make me look like i dunno what i'm doing COS I DO NOE WHAT I WAS DOING. CLEARLY.

i guess i shall go back to the 'idunwanatalktouandishallnotrespondunlessabsolutelynecessaryandifutryandtalksomemoreulljuzendupfeelingandlookinglikeanidiotsomyadviceisBUZZOFF!'

i had a minor setback, well, several minor setbacks during my 2nd week... i think i almost failed for safety.
oh wells, better make a list of to take note and mental steps b4 i see all my pts..
mid eval- cld be make or break wk...

ON THE OTHER HAND... there's a reason for me to look forward to travelling all the way to changi! haha :))

finally, first wk has ended. somewhat reminds me of CE3B. hence, i shall take ALL PRECAUTIONARY MEASURES and DO MY BEST FOR WK 2's EVAL!!!! JIA YOU EVERYBODY!

within 2 days, i spent way too much on food(REALLY GOOD FOOD AT FOSTER'S), presents and a pair of LEVI'S jeans tt i kinda bought on impulse! SIGH. what to do??!??! i seriously can't step into a shop with cards and cash on me man! tt's the only way to stop me from buying stuff!
had 2 gatherings over the fri and juz now.. had fun playing skip-bo and family business! hahaha.. really shld juz go mind's cafe one day and play all wkend long man!!!! so good to see my friends. haha.. and parting with them.. well, it's more like i dread the cmg monday than feel the sadness of parting with them.. then again.. it's probably the last time i'll see this bunch until dec 04. haha. uni life is insane man. so are we.

so much to do... and there's a chelsea match later! haha. kinda juz wana waste tonite away.. tmr.. hopefully it'll be more productive?


ya rite.

it's the time of month again.. well. not THAT time of the month.. but yea, clinicals are here to haunt me again..
on a positive side, i'm doing all these at HOME. singapore the little tiny red dot. the comfort of having my own desk(tho extremely messy), a desktop with great wireless that doesn't screw up every 1.5hrs (it better not!) and a awesome bed to toss and turn over every nite..
though i'll probably miss the free transport (bus '11') and late starting time.. but yea.. let's see what i can do with this placement.. hopefully i'll get the most out of it...

went to idp with fran to apply for several unis.. tho on one hand, we're pretty anxious abt the damn limited places, both of us are really looking forward to the chilled out and cool aussie lifestyle... fran n i .. well.. along with su and hc.. have came a long way man... i'm really glad to have all of them in my grp :)) really grateful for all the work they've put in, esp during the 4 days i wasn't here.. i think we make an awesome team.. tho not so during report writing. haha.. definitely gonna experience some up & downs later on (when i go off to slack. haha) but i'm pretty sure it'll brg us even closer together... haha. die die also muz finish report mah.

busy period cmg up next. but wateva it is, at least i'm at home..

it's gd to be home.

Good to Be HOME!

finally back home!

it was a good experience despite everything that had happened.

friendships were made.. and broken (in my case). it's unfortunate of course, but through this period of living with one another, u can really see the true colours of someone... the not so pretty true colours.. It's easy to have a friendship and just hang out for a day or so.. but having to live with someone else in that cramp and crappish room really brings out ur true personality and that everything u used to see on the surface were juz the decent cover of a really terrible book.

well, the good thing that come out from here is that i was able to experience LOTS of LOVE from my MUMMY! haha..... strange, but yes.

i wouldn't say i did nyp proud thru this clinicals- others cld have definitely done a much better job. Likewise, i wouldn't say that he was the best ce of all. i feel shortchanged, like i went there but i didn't get as much as i wanted.

Bungee was my main highlight. did u know u weren't suppose to actually JUMP off the platform, but instead juz to lean forward? (yea, i vaguely recall tt from somewhere else too)
sadly, i had TERRIBLE photos and TERRIBLE video, so i will definitely NOT POST my video. Definitely will do it again!!! JOIN ME MY FRIENDS!
Bungy(haha, i realised i keep spelling it as BUNGEE) vs skydiving
==== hmmm.. the 'weirdest' part abt bungee was the leaning forward, cos it's super OMG - like what the hell am i supposed to do?????? for skydiving, thinking back, the part where i was gasping for air was pretty scary too. but skydiving i won't do it much often in future, cos of the air pressure differences... unlike bungy where u dun really experience much physiological changes.. and also i wana train my abs so i can pull that damn strap off at one go next time!

it's a weird feeling to be totally by myself compared to being myself in the presence of the other 2.. there's more comfort in numbers in the latter. not that it really matters right now, since i'm at the lobby watching boys over flowers. but yea, i'm curious to know where they are right now...

this wkend was pretty relaxed i guess. to be staying in hongkong and not having to worry abt what condition the next pt will present with or wat are the biomechanics of this and that... it's juz pure holiday..

Hai. can't believe that for the ortho inpt, i'll still be graded. kena stumped by all the simple qns today...


i can't play catch up anymore. any longer.
i miss being alone without being lonely.

i noe many of the 'consequences' are the results of the decisions i made, but i guess that's juz who i am. it's hard to put it in words. maybe i'm a complicated person who doesn't like to be 'manipulated', i like things to be done my way - unfortunately, when i'm ard with ppls who are more outspoken and have a mind of their own, instead of speaking up, i'd rather go do my own thing, my own way, myself, alone.

if u stay in a foreign land for 6wks with ppls whom u're are not used to, u either hate em or love em.
but whateva the emotion u choose for the person, only express it after the 6wks.
until then, u juz gotta suck it up, cos they are the ones u sleep next to every single night...

28 days have passed and i've made up my mind.

soon! ppls, i'm cmg home REAL SOON!!!
and soon i'll be able to treat my 2 kind friends for the help they've provided me few mths back! :)))))

i can't WAIT to get out of the clinic man! wk 3 was still tolerable. managed to survive somehow... but i dunno how much more he'd expect from us on the last wk!! i'm secretly glad i can't speak canto, so perhaps he doesn't expect me to give pt education.. haha. but then i wished i was able to understand the language more. cos it seems like my ce is so good with his pt, building up rapport and stuff. and i really wish i know what he was saying to the pt so i can pick up some stuff from him!

sigh.. i wonder how it'll be like if i'm here with my good pals instead.. haha.. i dunno... guess it depends on who..

hmm.. inservice is such a chore. i'd be out shopping like mad if it wasn't for inservice. not that i'm very productive anyway. juz kinda waiting for them to pass me the impt info..

miss the days at sydney.. guess it's always the case. when i'm in sg, i'll yearn to go overseas, and the moment i step out of sg, i wish i was back in sg. why is it this way??? i'm like half looking forward to gg aus for further studies, but now... after been to sydney for 1wk and hk for 3wks plus(soon 5wks), i can't decide if i really wana leave the stupid little red dot.

Updates from HK!

it's been super long since i last updated! been thru quite a lot but i'll try to summarise them all

day1: at the airport. started out really embarrassing cos my mum was rushing for work, and she kept insisting on me and the rest to check in. while the family of the other 2 are still like 'dilly dallying'.. which is understandable on their part. but i still feel my mum didn't have to be so kanchiong to send me off for a 6wks HK attachment

my 4mth old samsung pixxon broke down on me the moment the plane landed in hk. it literally burnt up. -.- so annoying

we got lost on the way to the hotel becos we took bus instead of cab. BAD CHOICE. DUN EVEN DO THAT OK. [now tt we look back on that experience, we cld have found our way easier since we juz walked rounds and rounds abt the hotel. but still. if u have a 20kg lugguage. TAKE A CAB]

sobbed and sobbed on the first nite there when we found out the room was freaking small. it was really extremely small.. and all the problems surfaced upon us and we just cldn't control our tears... fortunately, a kind soul appeared and we managed to switch to a bigger room the next day. accommodation- settled.

Clinicals. our CE is no-joke, no-nonsence kind one ok. tt says it all. nothing close to my neuro CE in ttsh. and we had peripherals on top of spine cases! ARGH. anyway, i was really stressed out during the first and 2nd wk. cried and called my mum to talk abt it.. it was quite similar to how i felt back on the day before bio Alevels.. juz extremely painful. not to mention i was in a foreign land far far away from home. did not help at all. but after a while, i got settled. i dun think my mid-eval is extremely reflective of my competency due to lack of spine cases. so. oh wells. i hope to do better within the next 2 wks since my spine placement is only 4 wks short. [yes, i'm extremely happy to say that my spine placement is only 4 wks. i dun think i can handle this amt of stress any longer. but of course tt meant i only have 4(now 2) wks left to redeem myself... ]

shopping wise- let's juz say i'm the type tt will buy stuff tt can be found in sg overseas. yea. so brands like esp nike and adidas- i'll buy them when i'm overseas cos tt's when i can spend the money more at ease. haha. rubbish. wateva... i haven't decided if i shld get converse anot.. not really my style. haha. maybe la. still got one more yr of uni(if i get in). i juz feel like my sense of style and clothings shld change now tt i'm a adult..ok. tt's abit rubbish. i can't phrase it well. but yea. something along tt line tt i shld dress nicely more. haha.

hmm. i declare sunday my free and easy day. cos the other 2 go church, and i decide i shall do whateva i like whenever i want. so yup.

yup. food is alrite here... had a century egg porridge lunch diet last wk.. haha... muz save money over the wkdays so that i can spend more over the wkends!!

i miss my mummy.... everytime i'm sad and i talk to her, i'll miss her more... and i'll end up crying... i dunno how my grades will turn our - both the exam and the placement grades.. i really hope i'll do well this 2 wks and prove my competency.

on the brigher side...

i realised the past few entries have been way too depressing. so i shall have a "happy" one for now!

ok. so clinicals are over. obviously i dun fare as well in clinicals as i had so in my yr2 semesters. i forsee the one in HK won't be any easier, but i shall TAKE ON THE CHALLENGE and conquer my fear for outpt! hahaha :)

HK. yes. speaking of HK. i'm leaving in abt 10days time? that's damn fast rite?!
started packing alr... though i'm not too sure what books or lecture notes to bring along.. damn i only have one nite to pack! i hope i dun have to buy anything last min. most prob can buy it over at HK bah. quite excited...

... BUT

exams is in 7 days. i feel like i haven't had decent muggin session for super long. the pass few days juz doing paeds was driving me crazy. so glad i'm done with it alr! phew. which is why i'm quite happy. haha..

i wana go macau after hongkong! i wana see the remains of that st paul's cathedral. the one where boys over flowers had a scene there...it's been so long since i last got addicted to a drama serial.. it's nice to have something to look foward to watch every sat. too bad i can't do so for the next 7wks! damn! muz record them down!!!

hai. yet another placement to pull down my overall gpa. i dunno how my exam grades are gonna help pull up the overall.
GRADES REALLY DO MATTER. no matter how much u learn from the placements or based on the mistakes u make, grades are the ones tt are so possibly gonna make or break u.
well, in my case. i think i'm pretty screwed.
i didn't think my clinical skill will be this bad until i actually come for outpatient.
i need more C2s. this is insanity.

i really want to have a part in making these people better.
but i'm not sure if this is meant for me.

SUCK IT UP JOYCE!!!!!!!!!!

to be honest. i haven't really learn much this placement. and it's been 3 weeks alr. this wk passed esp fast. i tried to redeem myself. but there wasn't really much opportunity to do so.

i dunno what to do man.

i have the worst grades ever over this past sem!!!!!!!
D+ D+ C+
SERIOUSLY CRAP MAN.
Like so what if i can "afford" to go to a uni now? i dunno if my grades can still ensure me a univerity entry!!! F*&^$#@!$%&* juz cos got scholarship doesn't = confirm entrance u know!!!!!!!!!!!!

damn it man.i muz now get almost full marks in order to juz get a B+. SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT.

prediction for exam papers:
CP is damn hard.
AP is HARD - unknown.
MS- usually ok, but this time round maybe not becos of youknowwho

have i been slacking too much? issit becos i dun stress myself before the tests, tt's why i've stopped achieveing better than what i could? or was it really becos the paper was too tough? hmm.. probably my fault. the way i handle stress.. taking everything to be too easy... wrong! i muz change asap. i gotta aim higher and produce a miracle during the exams. (my heart totally sank as i type the previous sentence.) it's so tough.

now.. i juz wana enter a university... tt's all....

annoyingly cute. dammit




all the best for wk3!

oh i can't wait to have my room to myself!!! first is to remove the ugly cabinet tt takes up half the room! then buy new bed, wardrobe, nice desk, and one extremely comfy single couch to lay on. oh, and a punching bag wld be nice too.

first wk at ttsh is fine. not the best. but definitely have the cutest CE of all. haha. all neuro PTs are so soft and nice.

too busy/sleepy to study this weekend! slept from 10pm to 10am today. rushed to bro's engagement. slept again. watching harry potter til midnite or smthg. then boys over flowers. (YES I'M WATCHING TT SHOW. IT'S QUITE NICE. I HAVE TO ADMIT IT.)then tmr gg to watch harry potter (6) in the noon, then AT NITE, gg to watch harry potter AGAIN (on tv). haha. it's like the harry potter weekend. hopefully can go jog a little in the morn (provided i wake up early!)

wants to start on my obesity essay and AP revision soon!