Saturday, May 21, 2005

moment of truth

yesterday went to play tennis... realise that i really sux at it... esp serving... worse thing is i dun even wanna try... actually it's not that i dun like yh to serve... it's juz that.. we dun have enuf practice... then...it can be quite a waste of time... then... it can be kinda unfair to the other party, me.... haiz... i'm not blaming her... i also wanna practice.. but no one's there to guide me...
then afterwards play badminton... haha... realisz that i'm really terrible at that sport... as least compared to yh and sm.... maybe becos i was playing tennis before that... but then... so was yh.... oh well... i guess i finally realise that i'm NOT a very SPORTY person.... that's kinda sad... cos i do enjoy playing sports... maybe i shld learn from yh.... "dun be afraid to learn... dun be afriad to make mistakes"

argh... i'm having leg and arm pain... eeks... abit of back pain.. cos yesterday was more of picking balls then hitting them...

been failing tests the past month... borderline fail mark for both chem and bio... kinda pissed... math, of course is fail terribly... even gp... i think i was the lowest... hiaz... i'm supposed to be hardworking.... i guess it's time to change my approach on how i shld study.... THINK NOT MEMORISE.... hiax....

well, at least i am pleased to have watch the tennis matches... i was glad i met them... but on the other hand... i'm glad i will probably not see them anytime soon... haha...

Friday, May 13, 2005

miserable life

life is really terrible for her.. she failed her 2.4km test... failed her math test again and failed by one mark for her chem test. she could have done alright for the chem test...but she got careless during some of the ques... well, guess wat? she's abt to fail her bio test too...

this 17 yr old girl is feeling kinda depressed.. she isn't really a big fan of her class... there's this invisible cliques formed.. quite obvious but only the class tries to hide it by being together... she misses her old friends... friends like kahyin and vanessa... the ppls she could be ard with and be comfortable with toking and laming ard....

as for the 2.4km run, she got a record breaking of longest time - 20.48min... but her teacher seems really nice.. cos he did say the word ' good' when she finally completed the six rounds... she's gonna strive harder... cos she noes that even her good pal can pass with 16+min... nothing shld be impossible.... she's juz gotta rmb: mind over body.... but wat to do? she's always tot herself as someone with no brains not brawns.... she is also gonna pray for her sit-ups and standing board jump.... hoping she will get the bare min.... if she can't get a silver for her 2.4, at least she wishes to do well for her 5 stations.... there won't look too bad afterall...

after failing a couple of tests, she is beginning to feel the pressure.... the stress.... she's afraid she won't be promoted.... but then, these tests all add up to 10% only... so no biggie, rite? but still, she has to improve in her studies, esp math... in sajc, the tests are totally different from the tutorials... argh... she grumbles in unfairness as she knows she wasn't born to be good in math...
she fears the tot of being retained... there's the new syllabus and the part abt not being with her friends... graduating one year later... terrible, man...

she initially tot she had a great PI idea... but she's totally screwed cos, it seemed like she needs alot of help... as appeared from wat the teacher said.... she noes what she's gotta do, but she juz doesn't have the idea...

well, for ppls who had been reading her od and now this blog, they should noe that she's kinda changed the contents... she dun complain abt the POINT of doing various things... she juz complain that she can't do them well.... cos she noes that it's no use complaining and saying ' wat's the pt of doing these?' the govt ain't gonna change anything.. even if they do, it won't be anytime soon... so quit it, juz do it.... try your best

she think some ppls in her class see her as an isolated case despite her presence ard another friend... wadeva... she think she need to buy some self-help books for herself to improve in her
interpersonal skills...

Monday, May 02, 2005

sick...

came back from yesterday... got sicked... but i still went for the supposed class gathering... well, i have to say my class is very smart... as in most of them.. who didn't turn up.... perhaps they predicted that no one's gonna turn up.. that's why they dun come... of course, there are the ppls who say they got something on... something that kinda piss me off is the fact that the few of them who said they can come didn't turn up... AND they didn't inform us... but i'm glad kelvin, xinyi, yongkai and sy turned up... well, there are 5 ppls, so it makes it a grp outing... i dunno whether the outing was considered successful... but we din really stone there... so it's good...
oh for dinner, jas came along... really appreciated that... thanks ppls...

well, i'm truly sick... at 8am, my body temp was 38 deg celcius... cool, huh? okay... no it's hot... i dun really feel sick despite the high temp, though... going to see doctor later...